My Life in Seven Days #3

November 14, 2021, Sunday

I gazed at Danish artist Knyttir’s “Lonely little superhero,” “Tuli dances in the dandelions” and her other magical watercolor artworks. This one is beautiful, too. I hope to buy at least one print. I plan to paint again.


Mama visited again, very briefly before she went to visit Dad. I was happy.


I watched three true-crime documentary films. 


Overwhelming thought: Dad died in May. Six months ago. It felt like six years ago. I called my mother. I’m getting better at patiently dealing with her free-spiritedness this time than last. 


I like this line from Jasmine Liu’s review of Whereabouts by Jhumpa Lahiri, which is published on Asymptote: “Solitude, I suspect, refined my powers of observation, which in turn left me with more intense memories.” 


I’m grateful that I stumbled upon Asymptote’s unique “system of structured volunteering” that is worth studying for an exciting future passion project. 


November 15, Monday


I noticed that my daily self-care logs are getting longer than the first post. I learned that my experiences become more meaningful when I focus on them, observe them.


My husband and I had fun trying out voice commands and voicemail. We promised to do the latter often even when we’re together. 


I promised to have tea with my sister in her room.


I looked for gift ideas for tea lovers. My sister became obsessed with tea after reading a webtoon. 


November 16, Tuesday


It rained hard. The balcony got flooded. 


Jac-Jac got vaccinated again. My husband took me to a detour before going home from the vet’s clinic. I was happy.


God blessed our table.


My husband sent me two beautiful voice messages before he went to bed and while I was at work. 


May God give me the strength to see a project (with a depressing subject) through.


I missed my dad. I remembered all loved ones, friends, and colleagues who died of Covid-19. My heart was heavy.


I chatted with my sister on Messenger. I called my mama. They both bore good news that lifted my heart. One day at a time. 


So many things to celebrate. My mama-in-law was finally able to walk from the living room to the bathroom. Also, DTI registration for the Nanshe Store was successfully renewed. And bank matters were settled.


My husband and I talked well into the night.


Today was another mental struggle as I tried to unlearn a couple of unhealthy work habits. I was being too hard on myself by making unnecessary promises. 


I lived well today. Still grateful beyond words. 


November 17, Wednesday


I cooked ginisang beans. Then I had a sudden anxiety attack. I took deep breaths and thought of something positive.


The pink gladiolas and yellow Malaysian mums went well together. Separate vases, though, but beside each other. 


Dog training is challenging, but I enjoyed it a lot. I walked my dog. He likes the stray cats, but they don’t like him.


Two haikus:


Beyond the window:

A sky so blue, clouds so white.

I’m held in mute awe.


Blood-pink leaves stretched out

from invisibility, 

telling green girls, “Come!”



I listened to Chopin while checking student papers. I don’t know anything about classical music except that it sounds magnificent.


I worried about Winter, mama’s dog. He seemed to be on hunger and water strike.


November 18, Thursday


It was difficult to wake up. My heart was unreasonably heavy. Right away, my husband asked me to say out loud the silver linings, and those warmed my heart and sizzled my physical being into grateful wakefulness.


The gladiolas are still beautiful. I took a couple of different angles. 


My family had a good breakfast. We had tuna for dinner.


Banks are not very memorable places for us. We both nearly died outside one years ago.


Remember the day I didn’t know what to reward myself with, after much urging by my husband? Well, I ordered five pairs of slippers for P500 in Lazada’s 11/11 Sale, and I’m going to give one pair to my mother. That’s enough reward for me.


I had one of the funniest video calls with my mother at lunchtime. She talked about her pet hospital experiences and she cracked the weirdest, if not the most sarcastic, jokes I heard. 


November 19, Friday


When was the last time I received a book mail until today? I couldn’t remember. I gratefully received a complimentary copy of Sinug-ang 2: A Cebuano Trio by Ester Tapia, Erlinda Alburo, and Corazon Almerino. 



I finished work early and went to Ayala Central Bloc with my husband, mother, and sister. 


We went to Daiso and I bought one pack of each type of peanuts available there: almonds, cashew, walnuts, and sunflower seeds. 


We also bought sweets from the Candy Corner and had drinks at Treat Street Cafe where we bumped into Hans, the husband of my college friend. 


My husband and I dropped by Fully Booked to claim my discount card and buy three books.


I also happily directed my mother into posing at different locations in the mall and took pictures of her. This is one of my favorites:



The short respite made me realize how tense I was, that I was unreasonably holding my breath, that I needed a screen break and to get out of the house.


November 20, Saturday


I cleaned my workspace until 2 a.m. at a very slow pace. Jac slept with mama-in-law at dawn.


This week was intense–I had both my ups and downs almost at the same time. It felt like a very long week.


I took Jac to an active walk that drained the energy out of my sleepy knees. I met both my classes. I look forward to the end of the semester. 


I watched Violet Evergarden: The Movie, and, like its predecessors, it made me cry.


Congratulations to the winners of the Best Cebu Blog Awards


I took a long nap. 


I just realized my birthday is in 11 days. I feel nothing about that fact yet.


self-care daily journal mental health

Comments

  1. Hrllo, Nancy. Daghang salamat for this sharing. I feel your tension in the sentences, the stutter and spurt. I admire your strength and, as always, your writing. Padayon.

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